We have departed the rugged and beautiful Wyoming. Yellowstone and the Grand Tetons did not disappoint once again. My wish is that each and every one of you get the chance to experience them, if you haven’t already.
Roxy and I landed in Three Forks, Montana after one last drive through the parks. It’s a quiet little town and a much-welcomed change after having to go into Jackson Hole, Wyoming for internet connection. That place is nothing short of a three ringed circus. Including but not limited to a little person doorman bringing people into his particular establishment. I shit you not.
But back to Montana…another wild and breathtaking landscape to take in. Now one thing I can tell you about this little bit of paradise is that the weather here is NOTHING like what I grew up with in Indiana.
Day 2 of camping in this quiet little campground and I noticed there was a very small storm rolling in. I looked at my radar and it was mostly green and very little blue. I thought, ok, we will just hang out under the awning and let this pass over us. I’m surrounded by mountains on all sides. As I turn to my right to watch the storm move in, I notice it seems to look like more than the blue and green I had saw on my radar app. As I’m considering taking the dog inside along with the electronics, I had set up outside, it happens. It seems as though they have a thing out here called straight line winds. Well, we have those in Indiana but try taking that times 1,000. How in the hell can wind blow like that while I’m surrounded by mountains? I don’t know and I don’t care at this point. Because upon set-up my mind thought, mountains? No awning tie downs. I’ll be fine. I could not have been more wrong.
All the rain I thought I was looking at was actually dust the wind was stirring up. I had exactly 2.3 seconds to realize this and to know just how screwed I was. Now, when I set up my space, I go all out. The outside is part of my living area. I have a mat, awning lights, and all the things that make my home feel inviting. The type of awning I have is electric and has this clever little channel that you can slide these little hooks into that hold the awning lights. My camping friends have already figured this out. I can’t roll my awning up and the wind is blowing like I’m standing behind a jet engine. Now when you’ve already spent a small fortune fixing the same problem that keeps happening on your RV, what do you do? You hold on to that son of a bitch so it doesn’t fly off the RV like the money out of your pocket to replace the damn thing.
Because holding a large piece of metal during a storm is a brilliant idea. I told Roxy she was going to have to wait until this dies down before she can go in. I could have at least offered her my glasses as she squinted at me through the dust to look at me like, “Are you kidding me right now?” Some days I’m not sure who the smarter of the 2 of us is.
Anyway, as I’m riding this awning arm like nothing will stand between me and the belt buckle I’m sure to win after I dismount, my neighbor comes over. She says, “Can I help you?” Ummm…pretty sure you can see the obvious situation I am in. But, hey, I’ll play along, I say, “Yes, yes you can.” Because there is nothing like company as your ship is slowly sinking. We scramble to get the awning lights and hangers off so I can roll this sail up. As I’m jerking lights off the hooks, they start bursting one by one. The air temperature had dropped so significantly and the glass couldn’t withstand it. You guys really didn’t think this story would be that simple, did you? I had kicked off my flip flops during this ordeal and I’m dodging broken glass, wind, and odd questions asked at odd times from my helpful neighbor. Luckily, I had no stitches, a fully functioning awning, and a story I couldn’t make up if I tried.
I can’t wait to see what the universe has in store for me next…
