Well, we have managed to find our way out of the gateway to hell, I mean the Florida Keys. We limped back to the mainland, bruised and battered to regroup and collect ourselves. As most of you know Florida had a winter this year consisting of approximately 42.7 hours. The temps where we were fell into the 60’s during the day. IT WAS FANTASTIC!! No snow, no ice, no shovels, no salt…You get the picture. But in south Florida they have their own set of problems when the temperatures dip below tropical bliss.
However I know some of you may find this incredibly hard to believe, but there is a very long list of things we could NOT be marked safe from in the Florida Keys. Below I have compiled the short list of our bad fortunes in the islands this year. It was a long 2 weeks. Let’s get started…
1. Our ranger interaction in the Everglades National Park
This ranger interaction marks our second ranger interaction at a National Park. SECOND. We’ve only been to 5. Turns out when you rent a boat from a guy in Key Largo, Florida he doesn’t tell you where you can and cannot go…in a National Park. Even though you read all the signs around the islands. Hard to read one not there. Who knew that might be useful!? Speaking of the boat rental…
2. The boat rental
There is a reason tourism is king in Florida. There is much to be made from unsuspecting folks that work hard for their money and expect good service. Not even great, just good. Or fair would be nice. But I guess when you own and rent out a fleet of boats and still have to work a full time job, you really aren’t doing something right now are you?
3. The starter
Upon our arrival to the dock after dark, with no lights and all day on the water limping back, we unload the boat and pack up the Jeep with all our gear. We climb in and buckle up for the ride home. And the Jeep won’t start. So after our 2 mile walk home with all our shit, a trek back to the Jeep the next day, a push start to get it started, 2 visits to the parts store and we are now back in business with a brand new starter.
4. The revenge of the stone crab
It could also be defined as Montezuma’s Revenge, but in Florida and from stone crabs. And one might think that I might learn my lesson after my first experience, but as we all know I’m a very complicated person. And once is just never enough for me.
5. The GD no-see-ums
Or chiggers of the north, gnats, or biting midges, or invisible bugs sent straight from Satan, all of those are correct descriptions as well. Our first campsite in the Keys was a beautiful site located close to the water and mangroves. Which happens to be located in the center of their natural habitat. I closely resemble a small pox survivor. Still.
There are some honorable mentions to this list as well: 20-25 mph wind (nearly the entire time), the asshole lady that ran the front desk at the campground (and always seemed to be working when I needed something), the giant breakout on my lip from the sun (still there btw), and the feral cat situation (and the one that called our Jeep home for a night). Needless to say the Keys have not been kind to us and it will be a while before we return. But our fortune does not make it any less beautiful, especially with this girl.
The pics look great but life isn’t always what it seems. I have a lot of great memories with some fun friends that I’m lucky to have been able to make. But we have bad days too. Being on the road is hard. You are a tourist everywhere you go. You never stay in one place long enough to plant any roots. Finding a place to lay your head down at night is not a guarantee. Everything is always up in the air. And I would not trade this new life for anything in the world. It puts me outside every comfort zone I’ve ever had. It tests every bit of patience I still do not have. But I have learned and grown more from this experience than from anything I’ve ever done before in my life. And I can’t wait to see what the rest of this adventure brings.
